New Guy

Remember the New Guy I hired this past Thursday?

Friday he quit.

A computer broke him.

All new hires are required, among many things and for legal reasons, to watch two presentations on a website, 20 and 25 minutes each, on Preventing Discrimination and Preventing Sexual Harassment. After watching these videos of dos and don’ts and what-to-do-if-you-see-or-experience-It, you take a twenty question multiple choice quiz after logging in with your SSN so we have a record you watched and understood the lessons.

To cover our butts if you are the victim or victimizer of sexual harassment or discrimination, and we’re the recipients of a lawsuit.

We pay you to watch the presentation and take the test.

I knew I was in trouble when I sat him down to take it. He had no idea how to use a mouse.

In all fairness to him, he is 68-years-old, and he’s there to be a runner for us, a guy who drives most of the day to the other locations, to the bank, to the post office, and runs errands for us. He didn’t apply to be the Chief Information Officer.

Though in fairness to us, my 96-year-old grandmother, until quite recently, led quite an active life on the PC, going on two decades.

So, Friday afternoon, he went out with the guy who was showing him the ropes, and then never returned. Knowing what I know of him, he was probably ashamed of seeing me, in light of all the gesticulations, protestations and promises he gave me that he’d give me 110 percent.

The sad thing is, I’d probably move the mouse for him (in the presence of another employee – can’t be too careful with these legal issues), so he could get through the training and test.

But that’s not the path he decided to take.

And it turns out, it didn’t reflect badly on me, since everyone who came in contact with him liked him, thought he was perfect for the job, and were quite perplexed by his … denouement.

Back to the drawing board Monday …