Atlas, Shrugging

All right. I made this boastful vow sometime after the first presidential debate that if Romney won I would read the Book of Mormon, and if Obama won, I would re-read Atlas Shrugged. Feeling all cocky and defiant, I spotted the Mormon good book in a store the week before the election and picked it up in somewhat interested anticipation. I’ve read just about all the “good books” out there, save this one and the Koran.

Then, Tuesday, November 6th, happened.

Now – how do I get out of reading Atlas Shrugged?

I kinda remembered the plot of the 1,100-page book. I did go through a pseudo-Randian phase in 2000 when, living down south in Maryland for 18 months, I read a couple other of her books.

Then, I became Christianized, so-to-speak, and every major life event since has only served to cement that certainty I had found in Christianity.

What has this to do with the economic themes of Ayn Rand? Well, a lot. I was surprised to find such vehemence towards her work on Catholic blogs and forums. Now, I know one of her central themes is the “prime mover,” the industrial giant who moves society forward despite the antagonizing efforts of the “looters” and “moochers,” i.e., socialists and those who make a living off the teat of the government.

But what was so immoral about all this? Do not these prime movers make goods and services that elevate us? Do they not provide jobs for the lesser-capable and opportunities for the greater-capable to join them? (For the record, I’m still a “lesser-capable.”) Isn’t it immoral to be socialistic and willingly dependent?

I don’t know. Well, I have an inkling, but I’ll save that for a future investigative report.

Last weekend I went up into the attic to put some of the girls’ summer clothes into storage and saw three boxes of books. These are books I read back in the bachelor days and could not see throwing out over the years. Maybe there are twenty books in each box, and I fished through the nearest one and pulled out a yellowed and slightly warped Atlas Shrugged.

“I really, really, really don’t want to read this,” I whined to my wife, thumbing through the hefty tome.

“Go get a night job,” she said, not too concerned with my plight.

So I put it on the shelf for a couple of days. I thought: I must get out of my anonymously public proclamation to read this damn thing. Somehow. Might make a good blog post.

Well, I was driving home from work late Monday night when, on a whim, I stopped at a local library I haven’t frequented since my Lord of the Rings third reading.

Hey … that gives me an idea!

I went to the audio CD section, found the fiction, found the Rs, and – there it was! – the audio CD book of Atlas Shrugged!

What a co-inky-dink!

Atlas Shrugged is, interestingly enough, almost the same number of pages (1,100 and change) as The Lord of the Rings trilogy, at least the published versions I have. It took me three months to listen to Tolkien through and through – can I listen to Rand’s book in, say, half the time? Have it finished by the end of the year? A challenge, but one that would make reading this again fun. Fun in a book-wormish, book-nerdish way.

I’ll be eighty pages in by the end of tonight, averaging 20 pages a day. Mathematically that puts me at finishing the book/audio book in 55 to 60 days, just a little too long for my goal. That means I’ll have to read/listen to a little more on the weekends. We’ll see how life, the wife, and the little ones cooperate with that.

So – damn Obama! Now he’s got me re-reading Ayn Rand, despite all my protestations! Is there no end to his nefarious schemes?!