Hopper Unsupervised

All right. The wife took the little ones on vacation with her, down to her folks in South Carolina, eight days ago. I stayed because we’re banking my vacation time (which I don’t have enough of, anyway) and there was plenty for me to do around the house. They’re due back later this afternoon.

What does Hopper do without spousal supervision?

Well, it turns out I’m pretty tame. Should hope so, at my age. I did do a lot of productive work. I clocked an extra 9 hours of OT at the job this past week. Ka-ching, money in the bank. Uh, money already spent, that is. Around the house I was a whirlwind, too. With the help of my folks, we renovated Patch’s bedroom. That required me cleaning it out and slapping five coats of primer and pink paint on the walls. That’s about five hours labor there. Add to it mowing the front and back yards, hitting the grocery store twice, hauling furniture out of and into the garage, and keeping the entire house clean while the ladies were away, and you’re talking about a grand total of about 20 hours additional work I did while they were away swimming and whatnot.

How did I ever survive?

I think it was by watching really bad teevee.

Yeah, even working me like a dog, I still had two or three hours a night to waste on teevee. Bear in mind I also made heavy inroads into the two books I’ve been reading. I’m up to page 175 of Warlock and 118 of New History of India. But I have to shake my head at how, when no ones around, I turn to teevee.

Would that I was stronger! But as a naked Harvey Keitel shrieks in Bad Lieutenant: “I’m weak, Lord! I’m too f***in weak!”

What did I watch?

The good, the bad, and the ugly. And I’m not referencing Clint Eastwood’s spaghetti western.

Taken 2. Liam Neeson yet again whupping a** on some Eurotrash baddies. This time he’s fighting the Dos Equis Most Interesting Man in the World, whose son he killed in the original flick. Good, stupid entertainment, completely unbelievable yet so enjoyable I had no idea eighty-five minutes could zoom by so fast. An okay movie if you’re into this sort of thing, and like the majority of sequels, far inferior to the original. Grade: C+

Super 8. Saw this in the movies with the wife two years ago. A good Spielbergian film focusing on what Spielberg does best: monsters, mystery, and bad childhoods. Could have been better, though off the top of my head I’m not sure how. Kinda like the right side of my brain wants it to be better than the left side is willing to allow. Still, better than the majority of stuff you see on the big screen, and better than anything you’ll see on Syfy (pronounced “siffy” per Leonard Hofstadter). Grade: B+

America’s Book of Secrets: Bigfoot. Okay. Here’s where it gets embarrassing. Here’s where I lose my pride. Yes, I watched this junk. Now – let me explain. Normally I like junk like this. As I’ve written about elsewhere on this blog, I don’t really believe in bigfoot – but I want to. How it delighted me so as a child! Anyhoo, this show was absolute garbage. This “book of secrets” stuff panders to the conspiracy mindset who sees anything and everything as an admission – or non-admission, thus an admission – of governmental conspiracy. The episode’s premise was that the existence of sasquatch is kept secret by the government because – like the spotted owl – it would wreck the forestry-related economy of the Pacific Northwest. Yeah, right. As if this government we currently have were interested in a booming economy … Grade: C –

Mystery Quest: Alcatraz. At least, I think it was one of those “Mystery Quest” shows; not sure. Good background history on the island penitentiary, informative in an interesting way. Side note: I was there, a side trip on our honeymoon, and my wife snapped a photo of forlorn me sitting in Al Capone’s cell. Anyway, good stuff, especially on the 1963 escape attempt which Clint Eastwood based his 1979 flick on. Then it took the dumb road by bringing in psychics and ghost hunters to spend the night on the Rock and I lost all interest. Grade: C –

Land of the Lost. Incredible waste of time, energy, talent, focus, purpose, and creativity. See yesterday’s entry for this lament for Time Never to be Regained. Grade: F+

Escape from New York. Incredibly classic! What an impression this made on 13-year old me when I first saw it way back in the summer of 81! Deserves a blog post all in itself. Snake Plissken, the epitome of coolth. My generation’s Marlon Brando from The Wild One. Great characters, great set-up, great plot, great action. Poor Donald Pleasance! Movie never gets old or tired, even though I hadn’t seen it in at least ten year or fifteen years. Grade: A+

So, if you average these movies / shows up you get just below a C +.

And if you throw in the trio of Met games I watched, you flunk.

On deck tonight, with the wife at home: skittersssssssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!