Experiments with the Weird

Okay, so I read somewhere that I should eat a potato before bed. Normally, well, lately, I’ve been downing a pint of ice cream around 9, two hours before bed. Previously, I would sometimes have a couple of chocolate chip cookies with skim milk (instead of my usual soy) or a couple of tablespoons of vanilla yogurt with grapes, bloobs, and granola. Sometimes I’m real bad and have a handful of mini candy bars, such as Snickers, Milky Way, Three Musketeers, etc. All this an hour or two before bed.

Is it any wonder why I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in years?

Well, after my bout in the hospitals a couple of months ago I’m in a weird state of limbo. Sometimes I want to be real healthy, eat real clean, go as vegan as possible, drink filtered and bottled water by the gallon. Other times I eat like I’ll never die: junk food, pastas, sodas, you name it. The only thing I’ve been consistent on is alcohol. I’ve been beer-and-booze free for six months as of today; the second longest I’ve ever gone. Anyway, at this moment in time in my life, I’m trying to get some energy ’cause there’s something like a dozen or fifteen real important things that I need to get done, like, yesterday. And I can’t get energy if I can’t get a good night’s sleep, and I can’t get a good night’s sleep if I load up on sugar before shut-eye.

A few years ago I read a book that recommended the potato method. I’m not sure why. Something to do with balancing blood sugar and raising serotonin levels. Since I’ve been battling a weird, welterweight depression these past couple months, I know what serotonin is. And I know my brain is lacking in this chemical. Like endorphins, it has something to do with pleasure. The ability to feel pleasure, and to enjoy life, for one. A lot of those drugs the white coats will give a depressive jack up the poor dude’s serotonin levels.

Last night I had my first potato. Or, as I call it to the Little One, p’tater. The author says to expect vivid dreams early on, as your body adjusts, especially if your serotonin levels are very low. I don’t remember my dream or if it was vivid or not, but I do remember it was disconcerting and emotionally upsetting. I went to bed around 11:45 and woke at 3:45, unable to get back to sleep. Went downstairs, went online, and wasted three hours before the rest of the house woke up.

So, I’m just waiting for that p’tater to boil upstairs. Day two. If I have any electrifying early morning visions, I’ll be sure to make a note of it when I wake up and let you all know. Maybe try to keep it up for a week or two to see if it’s all worthwhile …