Oh to Sleep Perchance to Dream

In thirty years or so experience as an adult and dozen or so years of reading the topic off and on, I have come to the conclusion that the most immediate and important thing anyone can do is get a good night’s sleep.

But let’s back up a bit, shall we?

Metaphysics 101 – What is a man? He’s a being composed of three elements: physical, mental, and spiritual. Because they are fundamentally intertwined, in order for a man to be healthy, all three elements must be healthy. Or, put another way: the healthier the being and functioning of each three element, the healthier the man.

Nothing new there, right?

But here’s something new for me, at least when I first read it five or six years ago. If you have a whole bunch of Herculean things in need of doing, areas in your life that need improvement, whatever and whatnot, follow this advice: Start with the physical. Why? Well, first, because it’s often the easiest (or at least the most obvious), and it spills into other areas of your life more quickly and in ever-widening effect than, say, trying to improve some part of your mental or spiritual life.

There are several broad ways to improve one’s physical condition. The most important aspect to think about, to correct, I think, is one’s sleep. Because basically, if you don’t get a good night’s sleep, everything else – and I mean everything – becomes all that more difficult.

I haven’t got a good night’s sleep in forever. Seriously. Probably a good six or seven years, at least. I even dream about sleep. My fantasy is waking up in a giant bed, all by my lonesome, in some open-aired castle tower room, with a gentle, warm breeze stirring me, waking up refreshed after a good eighteen or twenty-four hour deep, refreshing, regenerative sleep. Last night I woke up six times in my seven-hours of “sleep”: twice to relieve myself, once to drink some water, once to take care of Little One’s nightmare, once by my wife flipping over and once by the phone ringing at 6:30 am. Now, that’s extreme, but every night is some variation of that theme. Two or three interruptions over a night’s sleep that’s two or three hours short of optimum.

So I’ve come to the conclusion that nothing substantial will ever get done until you take care of your sleep habits, first. I do get some decent sleep now and then. The best tips are all tips you’ve heard before. When I follow them, I generally sleep well. And when I don’t, well, I’m like a hungry bear the next morning, and my family suffers.

Face this fact: however much sleep you’re getting, you’re not getting enough. Sleep is one of those things where you can’t trade off quantity and still maintain quality. So you need to put the hours in, but remember that you’re body is resting, recharging, healing, strengthening. Know that. So the choice is to go to bed earlier, or sleep later. That adage about keeping the same sleeping schedule on the weekends as you do during the week is true. I have trouble getting to bed before midnight (the house is so quiet, and there’s so much I can get done – read, write, watch what I want on the tube – that’s it almost too good to spend in slumber!) but if I disciplined myself to nod off at 11, my health would improve noticeably. And I mean, others would notice it, not just me.

Now, to me at least, there are two other main problems with sleep. The first is getting to sleep; the second is staying asleep. I have difficulty with both, but I found a few things helpful.

I find getting a To-Do list in order an hour or two before bed (but not right at bed-time) works best in getting my mind placid. I feel better that there’s a plan in place and things aren’t slipping between the cracks. It gives my mind permission to think about pleasant things, and not Bills, Chores, Projects, Deadlines, blah blah blah. You’ve also heard the advice not to watch teevee right before bed. I agree wholeheartedly, though often I ignore it. It’s easier to get to bed after you’ve read something inspiring and interesting, rather than watching an autopsy and someone get shot. Obvious, right?

I pray at night, and one thing I incorporate is to try to list ten things I accomplished during the day. It’s a fun and enjoyable exercise and sends you off in a great frame of mind. More than half the time I’m out before I’ve finished the list.

Okay, I have children so I will be wakened during the night. That’s unavoidable. But that doesn’t mean there aren’t things I can do to help stay asleep. First and foremost, and most difficult for me, is no food or drink after, say, 8 pm or so. I’ve read convincing arguments that food in the process of being digested will disrupt the sleep cycle. And 10 pm at night is no time to make up a shortfall in hydration by chugging glasses of water.

So: Before any heavy lifting is attempted, you start with the physical. And the physical part you start with is your sleep. I am amazed at how well when I do get what for me is a good night’s sleep; if I could work these simple principles over the course of two or three weeks I should feel unstoppable.