Monday, October 29, 2012

A Giant Surprise


We’re watching the Giants spank Dallas yesterday and enjoying ourselves immensely. The little ones are hootin’ it up. So I give them their daily bath, towel them off, brush their hair and get them into their jammies while the wife cooks. Then we go back to the game and, to our distress, the Cowboys are spanking the Giants.

And it went back and forth for a tense fourth quarter. Eli does his thing, the final minute drive to score, and they do. But then Tony Romo decides to do Eli’s thing, and with seconds remaining, fires one to his wide receiver at the back of the end zone.

The crowd goes wild.

The announcers go wild.

We’re shocked and dismayed. In disgust, I turn off the teevee.

We send the girls upstairs, supervise teeth hygiene, read them books. The wife makes a phone call and I go down to the basement office to do a blog post. We watch Walking Dead. I get myself ready for tomorrow’s early-morning trip in to work. By eleven, I’m sound asleep.

I wake up the next day at five. Make my sandwich, have a bowl of cereal, shower, get dressed, get my umbrella, my cell phone, wallet, and book (Inferno), kiss my walking dead wife goodbye. It’s still pitch-black out there. No rain, but some eerie powerful wind blowing the treetops. I get to work in twenty-five minutes. (My bosses would later send us all home by noon.)

The wife calls me around nine. “You’ll never guess what happened!”

“What?”

“The Giants won!”

What?

“The Giants won!” She explains to me how the receiver had a finger or something go out of bounds before his feet touched, or something to that effect. I haven’t yet seen the video.

But now I learned one thing. Well, two. First, the New York Giants are the most hands-down frustrating football team in the NFL right now. In the sense that they make winning as insanely difficult for themselves and their fans nearly every single week. Everything goes down to the last second in a typical Giant game.

And, two: never shut off a Giant game until Terry, Howie, Jimmy, Michael, and JB are yuckin’ it up.

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